Kings, Queens & Great British Stories
June 7, 2015

 D: Did you know, we’re going to have a king next? Why do we even need a king and a queen?

Me: Some people like the fact that our country has a king or a queen – it gives us a rich history of true stories.

D: But they’re just normal humans like us, so why should they be a king and queen? Why should they be rulers?

Me: In our country, the monarchy passes the power to the government so that rules are more fair and it’s not just down to the king or queen.

D: And what does Mr Government do?

Me: The government is made up of lots of politicians.

D: I know. But what do they do?

Me: Well, it depends on who has been voted in by the people, but basically they argue with each other lots to decide on what’s best for the country and make lots of rules.

D: But why do we need them to make rules? Why can’t we just do what we want?

Me: Ah, you’re talking about anarchy! If you could do what you wanted what would you do?

D: I’d have a story CD every night until I didn’t want them any more. 

Me: It’s not the government who says you can’t have a story CD every night – it’s me, as your parent.

D: Well I don’t think you should make rules either. I like story CDs! Can I have one tonight?

Don’t hurt hamsters
August 6, 2013

hurthamstersBoy: I can’t believe in Danny The Champion of the World, when Mr Victor Hazell was going to see the Doc and he kicked the dog out of the way instead of walking over it!

Mum: I know, it was cruel wasn’t it?

Boy: Yes – it was SO cruel.

Mum: Some people aren’t very nice like that, they can be very unkind to animals.

Boy: Yes, like Jane’s brother – he doesn’t like animals and he hates them SO much that he threw her pet hamster DOWN the stairs!

Mum: Really? A real, live hamster?

Boy: Yes! And the hamster had to go to hospital because it had broken its leg and to had to stay there for a whole week!

Mum: It sounds like it might have been safer there. That’s awful – how old is he?

Boy: He’s 4.

Mum: Why do you think he did it?

Boy: I don’t know – he just doesn’t like animals. Except skunks. He goes to a club called Animals Karate Club and they learn all about how to not be nice to animals there.

Mum: I doubt very much that there’s a club which encourages children to be nasty to animals – that would be wrong.

Boy: Well, half the time they’re telling the children what’s cruel and half the time they tell them about what’s good, and Jane’s brother only stays for the half which tells them about how to be cruel.

Mum: Do you think they give examples of cruel behaviour – just to explain what you shouldn’t do with animals – before they tell you how to care for them properly?

Boy: Yeeees. But he only stays for the bad stuff, then he goes home.

Mum: Oh dear.

Boy: Jane’s changed her code on the cage now, because she had a code on it before, but her brother was watching over her shoulder and saw it, so she’s changed it now. I like the cage – it’s got a tube that the hamster can play in and a zig-zag cardboard thing with steps in it that the hamster can climb up when he wants to go up to his bed for a nap. And he’s got a hamster wheel.

Giant sneezes
June 23, 2013

giantsneezesBoy: I had a dream last night – it was half BFG, half school. One of the bad giants visits Stony Stratford – he sees our school and and he says, “I’ve been looking for that school!”

He sees us playing in the bottom playground – year 1 and year 2 – and he guzzles up all of the children up. I’m sad because he’s eaten up all of my friends and who am I going to play with?

My friend Lucy is hiding and sewing bird feathers. I ask her if she can change me into a bird; giants don’t like birds – they make them itch ALL day! I go flying above the giant and the feathers drop off onto him and make him start sneezing. As he sneezes, all of the children he’s eaten explode out of him, through his fingernails. And it’s not even the end of break time, so we can carry on playing!

Bedtime reading
June 13, 2013

newbook

BEDTIME READING
“We have started a new book?”
Age 5

That’s my bed and that’s the ladders. There’s George’s Marvellous Medicine on top of the covers. I can’t WAIT to read it!

Turning everything upside down
May 12, 2013

TheTwits[Mum walks into bedroom and finds Son doing a very bad version of a headstand on the bed – where his knees are still on the bed!]

Mum: What are you doing?

Son: Trying to see if I get The Dreaded Shrinks.

[Influenced by his TWO reads of Roald Dahl’s The Twits, illustrated by Quentin Blake.]

Alternative accommodation
March 23, 2013

peachstone

The ending from Roald Dahl‘s James and the Giant Peach

D: James lived happily ever after in the peach stone. That’s James in there, and that’s the Old Green Grasshopper in the corner, playing his fiddle [right]! They’re all the children coming to visit [left].

Story time
March 9, 2013

slugsupnose

Story time – Feb 2013

D: Roald Dahl sticks a slug up hise nose! Eew!

Crafty Crocodiles
December 8, 2012

craftycrocsD: I had a bad dream – it was a nightmare!

Me: What was it?

D: You and me went to a shop and we bought a crocodile. It wasn’t a real crocodile – it was a statue.
Then, when we got home, I thought “I’m not scared of this!” And I touched it. It broke into pieces, and you there was all real crocodiles inside that moved around. One of the crocodiles got hold of my hair and passed it to the other crocodile, who ate part of my head and drank my blood. He liked my head and blood SO much that he ate all of me and I was dead.

Me: That’s probably because of the book we’re reading. But you’ve not really had your head eaten by a crocodile, have you?

D: No.

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