Removing recognition
May 30, 2013

recognitionSon: I’m going to be very sad at the end of sports camp this time.

Mum: Why?

Son: Because there’s no wristbands, medals or trophy now – they don’t do that anymore.

Mum: Why don’t they do that anymore?

Son: Because the Coach has got a boss now and he says, “Don’t give out wristbands, medals or trophies at the end because it wastes too much time!”

Mum: Oh dear. And do you think they should carry on giving them out?

Son: Yes, because it’s a good thing for children.

Mum: Why is it a good thing?

Son: Because there are people who haven’t got them yet – like James – it’s not fair for him, he hasn’t got anything – no wristband, no medal, no trophy, nothing. They don’t do any of it now, and he just REALLY wants a wristband, a medal or a trophy! What I really want from there is a wristband.

Mum: Do you try harder if there’s wristbands, medals and trophies at the end?

Son: Yes, we have to work REALLY hard if we want to get one. In the olden days when I didn’t get anything I worked SO hard and I didn’t get anything so I just gave up – I just worked normally. Until eventually I found out that I still wouldn’t get anything, so I gave up from working normally. Then one day I decided to try again and that’s when I got a medal. And then the next time I tried even more and that’s when I got the trophy.

Mum: And how did you feel when they said they weren’t going to give them out any more?

Son: It shocked me so much that I felt angry to hear the news that they didn’t give out wristbands, medals or trophies anymore and to this day, I am still a little upset. I gave up being angry though, because the more you’re angry the less things you’ll get – do you know that?

Mum: That’s true. So, do you work hard when you go to sports camp now?

Son: Now it doesn’t matter if you work hard, because they don’t give out trophies or medals anymore.

Mum: But DO you?

Son: A little bit.

A few good captains
January 24, 2013

afewgoodcD: We didn’t know who the captains were for PE today. We usually have two, three or four.

Me: Oh. I suppose it depends on what games you play as to how many captains you need.

D: Huh?

Me: Different games need a different number of teams. So that would mean a different number of captains.

D: No. It depends whether you’ve been REALLY good – sometimes there’s four people that have been REALLY good, sometimes three, sometimes two, sometimes one – no, not one – two, three or four.
Aly was sitting out today and he said “I’m going to be captain.” I said, “I don’t think you are, because you have to sit out.”

Me: Why was he sitting out?

D: Because he’d done something extremely not good.

Domestic bonus scheme
January 13, 2013

domesticbonusD: Are we ever going to move house?

Me. Why do you ask that?

D: Just because I want to move house.

Me: Not at the moment. It costs lots and lots of money to move house and we haven’t got lots and lots of money.

D: So we won’t EVER move house?

Me: Well, if we run out of money one day, we might have to move to a much smaller house that costs less money to live in, and there might not be room for any toys!

D: Come upstairs.

Me: Why?

D: I want to give you some of my money, from my money box.

Me: That’s really kind of you, but I don’t want your money – we’re OK, we don’t have to move to a smaller house JUST yet! Thank you though.

D: But I want to give you some money!

Me: That’s lovely of you but no – don’t give me your money. I’ll tell you what – when you’re grown up, you can get a good job and earn lots of money and THEN you can give me some of your money!

D: Yes, because I’ll be rich! …Imagine if you have SO much money that it FILLS your house up, and you’re sitting in the dining room and all you can eat is money! And you go to find a toy, but they’re all buried in money and so you pull out the wrong toy and you can never find anything!

Me: That would be TOO much money wouldn’t it?!

D: Yes… I’ve got a plan!

Me: What, a career plan?!

D: Yes, I’ve got the goodest plan EVER about money!

Me: Go on.

D: You do a helpful job and, – where’s the 20p jar?

Me: In the kitchen.

D: You do a nice job for me, and I give you 20p from the jar!

Being good for Santa
November 20, 2012

Me: Hurry up and get dressed, Dylan!

D: You can’t control me y’know!

Me: Where have you got that from?

D: Well you can’t – are YOU my body?

Me: No, but your ears need to listen to what I’m saying and your brain needs to understand that if you’re naughty, Santa won’t bring you any presents.

Me: OK, let’s see if I get presents! I’m hurrying up now.

Sweet recognition
August 19, 2012

Me eating the ice cream prize for winning the talent show at kids club with my jokes.

That’s me [right], that’s the chair [coming out as oblongs into the centre]; that the table [square, top right]; that’s my plate and that’s my prize on the plate. That colouring-in is the house [to the left].

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